I love my white jeans I purchased two years ago. They are the most comfortable and flattering pants I own. From two years of dedicated wear (all year round, who cares about fashion rules), they aren't the pants they used to be.
As studying this morning in Romans and Galatians about surrender, my white pants (drying on the back of the chair) stared at me. God used my white jeans to tell a story.
Surrender is a sticky subject. We would rather talk about God's love, His freedom, His joy, etc. Anything over "surrender". But what I am learning is that His love, His freedom, His joy are all benefits to my surrender.
"I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." Galatians 2:20
When I read this passage a couple of days ago, I skimmed over it honestly, because of its familiarity. But the Lord began teaching me something new.
When I surrender, I literally don't have a life to call my own. Meaning, I don't get to call the shots, make the decisions, and "worry" about what will happen. It's not my life. I don't get the driver's seat. I am now a passenger. I no longer live but observe and participate.
...but Christ lives in me. He calls the shots, He is concerned with tomorrow, and He makes the decisions.
When the evil I want to do comes and shows its evil face (as read in Romans 7:14-25), in my surrender to God, I can't surrender to the selfish desire. I am BOUND to live in freedom from sin. Maybe this only makes sense in my head.
As we surrender our will and our lives, we discover who we really are. Enter the white jeans.
I think they still look great. A couple of marks from when my students ran into me with a marker, but you can barely see them. A little stained where it meets the ground, but who looks there anyway?
The devil's greatest tool in my life is saying that I am "pretty good right where I am." Who I am is great, my personality is great, and my life is blessed ENOUGH.
In the book by C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters, the devil is describing the process of surrender and why they would want to keep Christians from it:
"When He talks of their losing their selves, He means only abandoning the clamour of self-will; once they have done that, He really gives them back all their personality, and boasts (I am afraid, sincerely) that when they are wholly His they will be more themselves than ever."
I believe me and my white jeans are great right where we are until I walk up to a brand-new pair of white jeans and realize how dirty and filthy mine really are. I think my personality is just peachy and fun and pretty good, until I am faced with the fact that I was made to be SO MUCH MORE.
I am not myself. I only find myself in it's rarest and most beautiful forms when I no longer live, but CHRIST LIVES IN ME.
Chambers wrote "We have to keep letting go, and slowly and surely the great full life of God will invade us in every part, and mean will take knowledge of us that we have been with Jesus."
Why would I want to live in the drivers seat, continually screwing things up and getting myself hurt in my white, dirty jeans, just because it is familiar.
I want to throw those away and put on the righteousness that Christ has in store for me, move to the passenger seat. For when you are in the passenger seat, you are not as concerned as the process as you are the destination. You sit back, enjoy the view and the Driver sitting next to you. You will get to the destination eventually, but the ride is totally worth it.
